The Big Broadcast


E.C. Allberry

Trinity

GOOD afternoon, everybody. Well, here we are at Idwal our broadcast of an ascent of the Holly Tree Wall. I have a few moments to describe the scene to you. There are several hundred spectators – wouldn’t you say (Oh, fully that, I think) – grouped on the easier slabs below the wall. A band of pilgrims from the Tooth and Nail Club have just finished "On Ilkley Moor Baht ’At." Ah, here come the protagonists - you can hear the applause if I open the box, which has been suspended at considerable expense and an angle of 45 degrees from a large piton, by a firm of rock engineers from Munich. I’m told they brought up a pneumatic drill for the job. The climb is in splendid condition, isn’t it? (Oh, splendid.)

Now the climbers are roping up. I think Isaacs of the C.U.M.C. is leading, don’t you (Yes, I think it’s he), and Plimsoll of the Tooth and Nail is the other (Yes, I think so). Ah! now they’re off. No they’re not – the rope is tangled. Now they’re freeing it – they’re getting it free – it’s free – they're off. The leader is looking for a foothold for his left foot (Pitch one). He has his right arm jammed in a convenient crack – he’s lifting his knee up – up – I think he can just make that Ieft hand-hold – will he? – he’s pushing hard now with that right hand – Plimsoll is backing up magnificently – he's got it! Oh! lovely movement, Sir!

Isaacs made a great effort to pass that spot and now he’s going full speed for the cave. He’s got there now – he’s reached the belay (between pitches one and two). He doesn’t look too comfortable, but Number Two is getting ready to start now. He's a good man too - do you remember that mantelshelf on the last pitch of Green Ghyll last Easter? (Yes, rather - good show that was.) Now he’s off. He –

Here, owing to a technical hitch, the commentary broke off, to be resumed some ten minutes later.

Isaacs is now starting to climb the crack above the Holly Tree (Pitch three). He has his right foot in – no, it’s out again. Never in that time. He’s putting it in again – out it comes again. Climbers nowadays seem to find great difficulty in getting their feet fairly into a crack, don’t they (Yes, I think so). Ah! it’s in properly this time. There he goes, slowly up, I’ll give you the time in a minute. Are you ready? (Yes. Left – right – left – right – left...) – he’s doing 32 scrabbles to the minute – he’s making ground steadily – Ohhhh! he slipped back and lost all his ground, and took most of the Holly Tree with him. So that concludes our broadcast of the first descent of the Holly Tree Wall. Good afternoon, everybody. (We are now going back to the studio for dance music until 5.15 by Sammy Hall and his Rhythm Boys.)